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Attractive single Christian girls are boycotting Christian Singles Groups and are fucking* like unbelievers. I don’t blame the girls…Paul didn’t blame single people for having lust, and lust leads to fucking. Paul didn’t advocate fucking outside of marriage…his solution was for single Christians to marry ASAP. But church culture militates against the kind of behavior that leads to marriage.
Church culture is asexual, aseptic, and juvenile…Ughhh! In church culture, flirting is viewed as sinful and profane. Church stories generally avoid sexual themes; rather, they CONDEMN any hint of sexuality in people. Church culture eschews alcohol…biblical culture embraces it, though warns against excess. Church culture interprets the Bible through an aseptic, asexual, and juvenile lens, twisting the Bible. Church culture encourages single Christians to avoid marriage in favor of education and career…which, of course, leads to Christian girls fucking like unbelievers.
Biblical culture was sexual, engaging, and mature. Jesus flirted with the Samaritan woman at the well, for example, showing men that it is Ok to flirt with women and to be very sexual; he used double-entendres. The woman who washed Jesus’ feet with her hair was flirting with Jesus very openly. She was being VERY submissive to him with implicit sexual boldness and shocked the men at the dinner party. Jesus created wine at the Cana wedding feast…wine is for adults and often leads to sexuality…especially at weddings. Judah wasn’t condemned for using a prostitute and his daughter-in-law wasn’t condemned for prostituting to Judah. Continuing Judah’s line and providing for marital sexual partners for your family’s women was more important than temporarily acting like a prostitute.
Church culture teaches young men to be asexual, aseptic, and juvenile. No wonder the standard response of Christian girls to single Christian men is “Ughh!” Men who are juvenile are just boys. Boys are asexual; men ought not be. Boys avoid girls and avoid engaging girls; men ought to be engaging with girls. Christian culture pushes godliness and especially a twisted, asexual, aseptic type of godliness. King David was a godly man and an adulterer and a murderer. He was still miles above your average single Christian man boy. Not all of David’s behavior was above reproach, but he was always a man. David may not always have been a good man, but he was always good at being a man–and that is more important.
Men need to learn first how to be good at being a man…then they can learn how to be a good man. Church culture will fight against you if you try to implement this from the top-down. Wisdom says to do it sub rosa…at your own house/apt or at the house of like-minded individuals…be wise at serpents…be subtle and calibrate for acceptance of your ideas….
*Using profane language for emphasis or clarity doesn’t transgress the biblical mandate against cursing…that mandate is against condemning people, as in, “Go to hell!” Or, “To hell with you!”