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When you’re out socially, you want to be in the moment…enjoying yourself, having fun, relaxed.  Not spergy or anal or negative or analyzing.  You want to have your party animal hat on.

However, when you’re with women, you need to pay a little attention to how they are feeling.  Consider their feelings an entertaining show that you’re watching.  You get to play with their feelings and watch their responses.  It’s possible to get so mesmerized by social currents, dancing, etc. that you lose track of the feelings of a woman you’re with and she surprises you with something and you choke.  So, pay attention to the show…at least a little…continually…so you won’t be surprised.

Here’s an example where I was surprised.  I was dancing with a pretty woman and she diminished the distance between us so that we were in bodily contact.  (The dance cultural more is that women get to determine the distance from their partner.)  This happened at a dance studio where I was focused on practicing dancing, not on romantic interactions because it was a dance practice time.  Silly me.  I should have been paying at least a little attention to my partner’s feelings even while practicing our dance patterns.

Calibrating is also important in a relationship.  If you are giving your woman comfort (say, a kiss) and she is annoyed, she has too much comfort and needs drama to siphon off the excess comfort.  She will also need flirting to get more tingles.

So, my latest maxim is:

Always be calibrating.